The Me Day

So, I lost my temper yesterday. I don't think I was up for the Mommy of the Year Award anyway, but if I were, I probably blew it. It was just one of those days where everything I tried to do, B was right behind me, either undoing it, or worse...destroying it.

I yelled. Then I put him in his crib and took a much needed Mommy-Time-Out. I went and lay on my bed until I could breathe again. As I unsuccessfully tried to calm myself down,  I got resentful. I can count on one hand the times in the past year I wasn't at work, or with B or sleeping.  Hubby's been on B-free trips, and had a whole week home alone while I took B with me out of state. However, this isn't Hubby's fault. This is my fault. I can't seem to get over the guilt of dropping my son of at daycare when he doesn't have to be there.

So today, B is with Grandma, and I am at home...alone! I ran on the treadmill. I made breakfast for just me. I'm eating fresh blueberries that no one is trying to grab, spill, or choke on. I'm typing on the computer without an adorable face peeking around the screen...then mashing as many buttons as he can get his little hands on while I'm still stunned by the cuteness.

My giant plans for today you ask? I'll probably clean bathrooms. Oh! To clean a bathroom without having to worry about chemical ingestion, toilet splashing and towels being yanked from the cupboards sounds divine.

I've truly lost my mind, haven't I?

Film Time Capsule and Mardi Gras!

This is the story of accidental awesomeness, six years in the making.

I love photography. At one time I was so in love with film I thought I could never switch to digital. However, that was long ago, and as I type, my film SLR gathers a new layer of dust. Film is so permanent, and I miss the anticipation of it.  I NEEDED those pictures in one-hour, because I was DYING to see how this shot or that experiment turned out. As much as I love instantaneous information, I sometimes miss the wonder and excitement of it all.

Now, roll back the clock to Gulfport, Mississippi in the spring of 2006. I was in the deep south for spring break, working on houses damaged by Hurricane Katrina. My group went to the local Wal Mart to look for inflatable swim toys to sleep on. This was assuming that this would be the cheapest option to make the elementary school gym floor we were sleeping on a bit more bearable. While there we found disposable cameras in a clearance bin and grabbed a pile. You can't beat a $1 disposable camera!

Later, we discovered our deals were not all they seemed. Upon closer examination, these cameras printed "Mardi Gras 2006" along the bottom of every picture. Bargain hunter fail!

So I didn't end up using the cameras on our trip, not wanting my photos marred by Mardi Gras....they went home to Kentucky with me, where my husband mocked my purchase. Which is typical for him. 

We used one camera pretty quickly. The second camera hung around for a while...Every now and then I would see it and snap a random (not important) snap shot, then lose it again for a while. We graduated college, moved to Wyoming and in with Hubby's parents. We moved again to our own trailer hood as we waited for house prices to come down. Then in February of 2012, we bought a house and moved again. Every now and then the camera would surface, then disappear. 

As we packed for our last move, we found the Mardi Gras Marvel again, and Hubby snapped the last three pictures. Photos of me and our one-year-old son. The film finally made it to the developers. 

Age, rough handling, and environmental conditions ruined several pictures. Even those that turned out are not what I would call quality...or clear...or particularly sharp. However, that one roll of film contained six years of random, mundane, beautiful parts of our lives. Hubby looking goofy in our rental home in Kentucky. A picture of one of my lovable stray cats. Our cats stretched out on cheap carpet. Hubby posing with a graduation gown. Then our Great Dane, Artemis as a pup stretched out in front of the fireplace in Hubby's parent's basement. Pictures of me and B wearing matching football jerseys and smiling in B's first nursery. 

Six years of our lives, mundane and milestones were all recorded on a $1 Mardi Gras Time Capsule. That roll of film took us from college, to employment, to dog owners, to marriage and finally parenthood. Six years, three homes, two states and one adorable baby boy all wrapped up in a tiny metal canister.